9 Phrases a Pediatric Dietitian Uses at Mealtimes to Raise Intuitive Eaters (Picky Eating Tips for Parents)
If you are looking for picky eating tips, mealtime strategies for kids, or ways to reduce stress around food, the language you use at the table matters more than most parents realize.
As a pediatric dietitian, I often remind families that mealtimes are not just about nutrition, they are about building a child’s relationship with food, supporting intuitive eating for kids, and creating a calm environment where children feel safe to explore new foods.
Below are 9 simple but powerful phrases I use at mealtimes to help reduce pressure and support healthy eating habits.
1. “How does your body feel?” (Teaching Kids Hunger and Fullness Cues)
This phrase helps children learn body awareness at mealtimes. Instead of relying on external pressure to “finish food,” children begin to recognize their own hunger and fullness cues.
This is a foundational step in developing intuitive eating skills for kids and supporting long-term healthy eating patterns.
2. Food Exploration Questions (Encouraging Picky Eaters Without Pressure)
“Let’s explore the food on the plate. What color is it? What texture is it? Is it crunchy, smooth, soft, or slimy? What does it remind you of? How do you think it grows?”
This approach supports picky eating without pressure by encouraging sensory exploration instead of forcing bites.
Research shows that repeated, low-pressure exposure is one of the most effective strategies for helping children accept new foods.
3. “This is the meal I have to offer right now…” (Mealtime Structure for Kids)
“This is the meal I have to offer right now, but we will have another meal or snack at ___ time.”
This phrase helps establish consistent mealtime routines for children and clear boundaries around food availability.
It also reduces grazing and helps children understand when the next eating opportunity will be.
👉 Important tip from a pediatric dietitian: Always include a safe food for your little eaters at meals or snacks. This ensures children feel comfortable and are less likely to leave the table hungry. We never want a child to come to the meal and feel uncomfortable with all the foods on their plate. Check out our picky-eating blog post for more on this topic.
4. Offering Choices (Encouraging Autonomy in Picky Eaters)
“Which vegetable would you like for dinner? These are your choices. Would you like to help me cook?”
Giving structured choices is a powerful tool for encouraging independence in eating while still maintaining parental control over what foods are offered.
Involving kids in cooking also increases familiarity and willingness to try new foods.
5. Playful Mealtime Language (Reducing Pressure Around Eating)
“I’m going to see how loud I can crunch my bell pepper; can you crunch louder than me?”
“How many peas can you fit on your spoon?”
“Close your eyes and guess if I took a bite of broccoli or chicken.”
Using play-based eating strategies helps shift focus away from “just take a bite” pressure and toward curiosity and engagement with food.
This often increases comfort and willingness to explore foods over time.
We have a full toddler T.A.S.T.E.R.S guide with food exploration tips and tricks in our 101afterone guide.
6. Food Play Ideas for Kids (Building Food Familiarity)
“Let’s build a tower with cucumber slices.”
“What kind of bite would a lion take out of this meatball?”
“Can you make a smiley face with your food?”
These fun food activities for toddlers and kids help reduce fear around new foods and build familiarity in a low-pressure way.
7. “You are in charge of what your body needs” (Teaching Body Trust)
This phrase supports body autonomy in children and reinforces the idea that kids can trust their own hunger and fullness signals.
It promotes a healthier long-term relationship with food and supports self-regulation in eating.
8. “I’m still learning to like some foods too” (Modeling Healthy Eating Behavior)
Children learn by watching adults. When caregivers model openness and honesty about food preferences, it reduces pressure and normalizes that liking foods takes time.
This supports a more flexible, positive relationship with food for kids.
9. “You don’t have to eat, but we sit together” (Reducing Mealtime Pressure)
“You don’t have to eat the food, but we are going to sit together and talk until the meal is over.”
This helps reduce mealtime pressure for picky eaters while still prioritizing family connection.
Positive, low-pressure mealtimes are associated with increased comfort around food and better long-term eating behaviors.
Final Thoughts from a Pediatric Dietitian
The goal of feeding kids is not perfection, clean plates, or forcing bites – it is raising children who feel:
- Confident around food
- Comfortable at the table
- Able to trust their hunger and fullness cues
- Willing to explore new foods over time
By using calm, supportive language at meals, you can reduce picky eating stress and help build lifelong healthy eating habits.
References
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Taylor CM, Emmett PM. Picky eating in children: causes and consequences. Proc Nutr Soc. 2019 May;78(2):161-169. doi: 10.1017/S0029665118002586. Epub 2018 Nov 5. PMID: 30392488; PMCID: PMC6398579
Białek-Dratwa A, Szczepańska E, Szymańska D, Grajek M, Krupa-Kotara K, Kowalski O. Neophobia-A Natural Developmental Stage or Feeding Difficulties for Children? Nutrients. 2022 Apr 6;14(7):1521. doi: 10.3390/nu14071521. PMID: 35406134; PMCID: PMC9002550.
Torres TO, Gomes DR, Mattos MP. FACTORS ASSOCIATED WITH FOOD NEOPHOBIA IN CHILDREN: SYSTEMATIC REVIEW. Rev Paul Pediatr. 2020 Nov 6;39:e2020089. doi: 10.1590/1984-0462/2021/39/2020089. PMID: 33175005; PMCID: PMC7649857.
Fonseca NKO, Curtarelli VD, Bertoletti J, Azevedo K, Cardinal TM, Moreira JD, Antunes LC. Avoidant restrictive food intake disorder: recent advances in neurobiology and treatment. J Eat Disord. 2024 Jun 7;12(1):74. doi: 10.1186/s40337-024-01021-z. PMID: 38849953; PMCID: PMC11157884.
Goday PS, Huh SY, Silverman A, Lukens CT, Dodrill P, Cohen SS, Delaney AL, Feuling MB, Noel RJ, Gisel E, Kenzer A, Kessler DB, Kraus de Camargo O, Browne J, Phalen JA. Pediatric Feeding Disorder: Consensus Definition and Conceptual Framework. J Pediatr Gastroenterol Nutr. 2019 Jan;68(1):124-129. doi: 10.1097/MPG.0000000000002188. PMID: 30358739; PMCID: PMC6314510.
Mennella JA, Beauchamp GK. Flavor experiences during formula feeding are related to preferences during childhood. Early Hum Dev. 2002 Jul;68(2):71-82. doi: 10.1016/s0378-3782(02)00008-7. PMID: 12113993; PMCID: PMC2987582.
Patel MD, Donovan SM, Lee SY. Considering Nature and Nurture in the Etiology and Prevention of Picky Eating: A Narrative Review. Nutrients. 2020 Nov 6;12(11):3409. doi: 10.3390/nu12113409. PMID: 33171966; PMCID: PMC7694604.
Bell KI, Tepper BJ. Short-term vegetable intake by young children classified by 6-n-propylthoiuracil bitter-taste phenotype. Am J Clin Nutr. 2006 Jul;84(1):245-51. doi: 10.1093/ajcn/84.1.245. PMID: 16825702.
Cooke LJ, Haworth CM, Wardle J. Genetic and environmental influences on children’s food neophobia. Am J Clin Nutr. 2007 Aug;86(2):428-33. doi: 10.1093/ajcn/86.2.428. PMID: 17684215.
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Cinthia Scott is a Registered Dietitian (RD) and International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) with over 10 years experience in the field of dietetics. Cinthia focuses on ensuring optimal nutrition in the first 1000 days of life to ensure optimal growth and development as well as set the stage for long-term health. Cindy is an author, starting solids expert, and advocate for caregivers receiving evidence based education and support surrounding breastfeeding and starting solids.
Cinthia is co-author of the 101beforeone Starting Solids Book, “101beforeone -baby-led feeding cookbook,” and is the founder and owner of The Baby Dietitian LLC which is her private practice built to provide virtual 1:1 services for caregivers surrounding infant nutrition, toddler nutrition, and breastfeeding support. Cinthia is also the creator of the Starting Solids 101 Program which provides caregivers 1:1 support from a Pediatric Dietitian on how to provide optimal nutrition from the start and create healthy eating habits that will last their whole lifetime. To work with Cinthia, you can access her services here.
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